10 Things I’ve Learned From Moving To New York From Missouri

Thursday, September 18, 2014

A little insight into me, my home state, and my current state........or, 10 Things I've Learned From Moving To New York From Missouri

  1. No matter how many times you tell someone you’re from Missouri, not Missoura, they will continue to pronounce it as Missoura, just to spite you: In fact, they will continue to use that godforsaken mispronunciation for years to come. Case in point, “Hey Emily! How was Missoura?” “It’s Missouri” “Haha okay, so how was it to kiss your cousin in Missoura?” Ah yes, thank you so much, boy I met one time at a bar Freshman year, for remembering this one fact about me and then using said fact to make me angry every time I see your dumb face. (Fun fact, while writing this, my computer tried to correct the spelling of Missouri multiple times, so at least I have spell check on my side.)
  2. Also, no matter how many times you tell someone not to say “Misery” instead of “Missouri”, they again will continue to pronounce it as such:Hey. Have you heard this one?” “No”, I answer, wondering if they’re about to tell me a fun joke.  “Missouri? More like Misery. (commence douchey snickering)” Why no, random stranger I met in Freshman Computer Science, I’ve actually NEVER heard that one.
  3. No one actually knows where Missouri is:So where is that again? Near Texas?” No, not really but thank you for having so much knowledge about the Country you are apparently from.
  4. Continuing on that trend, no one actually has been to Missouri: It’s a fly over state, according to the world, and thus there is nothing to do here. “I think I’ve been to the St. Louis airport once, does that count?” NO, that does not count. Also...educate yourself, Missouri is great. We have the Arch. And baseball. Also Jon Hamm is from Missouri so you’re welcome, WORLD, for that bulge.
  5. People forget that St. Louis is in Missouri: Apparently, St. Louis is its own city-state, with no affiliation with Missouri. Same goes for Kansas City, the other well-known city in Missouri. People are somehow surprised when you mention St. Louis actually being in Missouri. Where the heck else did you expect it to be?
  6. If you’re not from Kansas City or St. Louis, people will not know where you come from: No one in the world knows where Columbia, Missouri is. Mention the Mizzou Tigers and maybe you’ll get a spark of recognition, but that’s about it for my place of birth.
  7. I am not stylish: The bar on fashion and style is set pretty low in Missouri. Hollister, Abercrombie, and Aeropostale were pretty much the go-to styles during middle school. We transitioned to Forever 21 and American Eagle for high school, but absolutely no one wore Valentino or Prada or anything fancy in the slightest, especially in High School. Coming to New York, I’ve realized my wardrobe is really not that snazzy. I have to actually put effort in when I walk outside, especially in the West Village or Chelsea, where good-looking people are the norm and I look like a crumpled piece of lettuce walking in my $3 Old Navy flip flops and garage-saled dress. Oh, fashion...you fickle beast.
  8. People will wonder how and why you’re in New York: During those stupid Freshman Icebreakers the script was; “Hi, I’m Emily, I’m a Freshman Communications major and I’m from Missouri.” I’ve never encountered a professor who hasn’t raised his eyebrows at that. Why are you so surprised that I’m here. New York is the city of everything!
  9. Public transportation is kind of the worst: Missouri does not do public transportation. I’ve only been on a bus maybe twice before moving to NYC. Also, the subway is disgusting and crowded and smelly and there are way too many suspect things happening on the F train. I’m used to driving, blasting the A/C and parking my car. Ah, simplicity.
  10. New York is absolutely incredible: All jokes aside about public transportation and how people perceive Missouri, New York is astounding. I can’t believe that I get to live and breathe this city. I’m thankful I get to be here and flabbergasted at what I get to experience on a day-to-day basis. For instance, a snow-covered central park changed my life (See photo above for proof) and seeing Saturday Night Live; LIVE in studio made me cry. I love Missouri. I love New York. I love that I’m not native to New York; it keeps the magic alive and makes me really appreciate everything I experience. I love everything about my life, from my roots in the middle of the middle of the United States to quite arguably the top of the top when it comes to cities of our great nation. So thank you mom and dad. Thank you Missouri. Thank you very much New York.

xo Emily

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